The pain of being married to an Autist

I had hoped, by this time in my life..age of 55...that I would be settled down.  In my future life with my new second husband.  That is sadly...not to happen.
I have NEVER .....experienced previously...dealing with such bizarre behavor in another person.  Especially in some one who professed to lve me so much.
Fraud, deceit, lying, rinse and repeat.

I have learned much, since December 14th, 2015.  The day it was confirmed that my husband was actually cheating on me with another woman.   Willingly.  And had handed over to her $10K.  Like a puppy following a bone.  It has been seriously pathetic, watching all of this transpire.

So, after the emotional trauma, I started to research.  Research WTH was going on with my spouse!  The naivete, the gullibility.  The extent of the lying and deceit.  The extremes he has went to conceal it all from me.  The sneaking around during his working day....taking time off from work to meet her at close by hotels and one residence.  I am appalled by his behavior and lack of consciousness.

I started my research with looking up the words "gullible & naive".   It took me all over the internet, through many different paths and rabbit holes.  My search led me to Autism, allegedly High Functioning Autism.

Spouse-has told me though the years, how he is unable to interpret people, and their facial expressions.  How he has always had severe difficulty with communication.  How he has always struck out with women.   He has shown me his low self esteem, although not admitted.  He has exhibited many of the symptoms of autism.

However, I am not going to bring it up to him.  There is NO cure. NO medication nor counseling to remedy this sad brain disorder.  It is a brain wiring disorder.  More than likely occurring during gestation.

So, I also went on to run astrological charts on him.   They merely showed me that all of those same very negative traits, were also in his chart.  Being re-enforced and underlined and replicated in so many different areas of his life.  He pegged him to a t...a Capitol T.  It was almost scary.

So, with what his astrological chart shows me, duplicated with those exact same bad behaviors brought out by the autism, and more brought out by his childhood filled with illness and emotional incest by his parents.   It has shown me an ugly side to the man I am married to.

My only hope, to keep my sanity....is to divorce him.